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9 responses to “Holidays Without Travelling”

  1. monicajane

    Dear Ricky,
    I wrote to you a while ago…I’ve been losing functioning for 2 1/2 years and now can rarely leave the house and it’s beginning to seem I won’t be leaving it at all very soon.

    I have to say, having been a busy, active person for 40 years and having traveled a lot, this piece felt devastating to me.

    Granted I appreciate that someone can feel good about this…it’s quite impressive…but I sure as heck don’t have the level of acceptance to have fun with this. I’m still angry and frustrated. And I remember REAL trips to such countries…

    how does one let go of dreaming they are really there? I am not there yet.

    1. Ricky Buchanan

      @Monicajane: I really don’t know how acceptance comes except with time. I think in part, that acceptance starts to come when we get through with grieving for our old lives and grief always takes its own time. I think that perhaps this is one thing that is easier for me because I got sick when I was still a teenager – I don’t know what I’m missing, in a way. That’s probably an odd perspective, but I’m an odd person and always look for silver linings.

      One thing I do recall is that taking up new passtimes – things I never did before I got sick – was less frustrating that trying (and failing) to do old hobbies as well as I’d done before. I know lots of people with ME/CFS have taken up scrapbooking or putting all their old photos in albumns (finally!) or learned to knit for those who didn’t do that previously. Finding a new hobby where you won’t always be comparing your new ability to your old level of ability may be less upsetting. But really, “the only way out is through” I think. Hang in there!

      And please feel free to write something about your sadness and frustration/anger for FWNL if you feel you can – this site isn’t just for us “old hands” who are used to this now. I think it would really help a lot of newly-housebound people to read about how somebody else is having a rough time too.

      - Ricky

  2. monicajane

    I was writing the entire time I was going downhill on a blog, but I’ve discontinued it.

    But I was writing to an audience who had no idea what was happening to me and couldn’t really understand. So writing here sounds interesting.

    I will consider contributing and thank you for the opportunity. Lately my concentration is so bad I can’t read or write much of anything but I will keep it in mind.

    I simply don’t know if this is going to be my long-term fate or not…I don’t have a distinct diagnosis though I know the trigger…so I have no idea at this point whether I will recover or not and that unknowing is awful…it makes it harder to accept I think…It’s all overwhelming and confusing.

    1. Ricky Buchanan

      @monicajane: You’re always welcome to write something – short or long, doesn’t matter. If you would ever like to, just contact me. Writing about how not having a diagnosis screws with acceptance would be great! My own diagnosis is pretty vague, so I do know what you mean about that. I eventually came to a place where I don’t much care where I’ll be physically in the future, I am just dealing with where I am physically now… but I’ve had 15 years to get to here, emotionally!

      Best of luck.

  3. Dolores J. Nurss

    What a wonderful idea! I have only been bedbound for short periods, but I’ve also used fantasy vacations for pain-control, and it often works better than anything from a laboratory (especially since fibro tends to block pain meds.) Can I please work for these people? One thing I have, that I can always employ no matter what the ups and downs of my health is word-skill. Could they use someone like me?

    And I can see a wide range of possibilities beyond tourist spots. Trips to other planets, trips to fantasy realms, trips to the past or future–anything we can imagine, we could create! And some folks, like Monica Jane, might prefer this. For as Ricky points out, they’d have no mourned-for point of comparison.

    Another thing to provide might be online links to appropriate regional music and sound effects. And an option for those not chemically sensitive might be scent cards (I’ve always thought that perfumes based on different locales might be a fun idea.) But they might need mailed separately from a different location, so as not to injure sensitive folks by accidental contamination.

    With the price of transportation as it is, some perfectly healthy folk might buy a virtual vacation package these days! Who knows?

    Great idea!

    1. Claire Wade

      Hi Dolores,

      Thank you for your comments, they are really appreciated! I love that you’ve seen the potential to these holidays to, as your ideas are some that I’ve had; but I’m having to wait for the time/enbergy to do them. I’m always looking for people to help and if you are interested in getting involved then please send me an email!

      On the comment about some people not liking the idea, I completely get that. I know these holidays aren’t for everyone; but that’s okay. I do them for those that do want an alternative to travel.

      Best Wishes

  4. Dolores J. Nurss

    Oops–I forgot to check off that I want notified of future messages. Sorry about that!

  5. Dolores J. Nurss

    Thanks! I will. I have my unproductive periods, too, but with all of us working together we can add up to something!

  6. Claire

    After the enthusiasm I found from people who wanted to contribute I’ve now set up a new site.

    I want to create a virtual world online, with contributions by people across the globe. Using descriptions, photos, videos and websites to describe what places are like. Similar to Wikipedia; but instead of being purely factual, it’s more of an experience as if the reader is really there, similar to my virtual holidays.

    Have you been to an amazing place? Taken an incredible holiday? Have you seen the cherry blossom in Japan, or the sunset over a tropical island? Or maybe there’s a great cafe, beautiful park, or brilliant museum near you. It doesn’t have to be exotic, or far away. You can describe your last holiday, or a tour of your local village or town. Share what it was like with others who may never get the chance. It only takes a few minutes to do and is really easy. You can add just a sentence or a more detailed description and then the different places will build up as more people contribute.

    The new site will be used in two ways, firstly as a free resource people can access to do some virtual travelling and secondly for me to use to help write the future holidays. I love writing the holidays; but find it hard to get the personal touches of how things really look, feel sound and smell so this seemed like a great way to gather that information.

    The sites in it’s early days and needs lots of contributions, so if you know anybody else who might like to contribute please forward this message on. Maybe they have their own restaurant, hotel, shop, gallery or museum and would like to write their own description of what it’s like to visit.

    Best Regards for 2010.


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